Girls
by strawberryfinn
Summary: JONAS new Disney show . COMPLETE. ONE-SHOT. Nick likes girls. He doesn't know what to do. So he gets advice from the best people possible. His older brothers.


**GIRLS**

**Author's Note**: With the premiere of JONAS, I figured it was time to post some fanfiction. Hope you enjoy!

**Summary**: Nick likes girls. He doesn't know what to do. So he gets advice from the best people possible. His older brothers.

* * *

Nick didn't know what was wrong with him; his whole body was shaking and he felt like throwing up. His cheeks flamed red and he felt like he _had_ to get out there and do something. _Prove_ something. As he gazed at the crowds of girls... something had _changed_.

He felt like an idiot, but he had to admit it.

Girls weren't gross anymore. Or disgusting, or cootie-filled, or icky, or _weird_ anymore. He looked out at all the girls and felt _consumed_ by them. Their _hair_ drifted so gracefully along their shoulders. Golden straw-colored hair, rich brown, shining black, massive curls of red. And their _eyes_! Deep blue orbs, or light blue glass, excited brown eyes. And their _faces_! Curved, slender.

My God, they were _beautiful_.

Nick stood there, his hands bunched deep into his pockets as he felt so incredibly _awkward_. So juvenile; young, completely _out-of-place_.

They were here for him. And his brothers, he knew that. Looking over at his brothers, he checked their expressions.

Joe had an easy smirk on his face. Joe, confident, funny--he could get all of them to swoon in a heartbeat. His smile shone with white teeth; his thin, muscular body laidback casually. He was watching all of them; he enjoyed it.

Kevin--Kevin's eyes were glistening. He seemed to be looking at them, but more looking _past_ them. He was happy; he was settled; he had a girlfriend, he didn't need them. But he still liked it, Nick could tell. And all the girls loved him.

Kevin was nice, down-to-earth, and kind. Joe was attractive, easygoing, and fun.

What was Nick?

Nick looked back and realized all the girls were leaving. _Darn, I should've been looking at them instead of my brothers!_

He watched as one of the girls turned and blew a kiss at Kevin. Another one smiled gracefully at Joe. Not one looked at him. Stupid brothers.

Nick crossed his arms over his chest. _Stupid Kevin! Stupid Joe! They're just so attractive, so incredibly talented, so_ perfect! _Well, you know what, I will_ not _ask them for advice on how to get a girl!_

* * *

"Joe... Kevin..." Nick stood against the door frame, feeling his whole face flame with embarrassment, his eyes looking anywhere but at his brothers. "Um... _howdoyougetagirltolikeyou_?"

Joe looked up from an article on Switchfoot he was reading; Kevin raised his eyes from strumming his guitar.

"What did you say, Nick?" Kevin asked easily, his fingers still drifting over the guitar strings. "Say that again? I didn't get it."

"You know what? Never mind," Nick started to leave, but Joe called him back.

"No, come on baby brother, you know we can help you out," there was a mocking note in Joe's voice, as always.

Nick took a deep breath and felt himself blushing again, "How...do...you...get...a girl...to like you?"

Joe laughed so hard he fell off the bed. Kevin tried to hide his smile, but it escaped.

"FORGET IT!" Nick snapped, starting to walk off.

"No! Nick!" Kevin started laughing, his eyes squinching up as he did. "Sorry, Nick, it was just kind of random."

"Does Nicky have a _crush_?" Joe whined, pulling himself back on the bed.

Kevin hit him on the head with a magazine that was on the bed. "Shut up. Nick, tell me what's going on." He moved some things on the bed, "Here, Nick, sit down. Come on. I'll help you even if this idiot doesn't," he pointed to Joe.

Joe sulked and returned to his article, still laughing softly.

Nick hesitantly walked over and sat on the bed.

"Now what's going on, Nick?" Kevin smirked.

"You're being a jerk! Stop it," Nick yelped. He'd never felt so awkward in his life besides the time when he learned what sex was.

"Oh, shut up, Nick. I'm just trying to figure out how to say this; we never get a chance to talk much anymore. Come on, let's talk."

_Darn, I guess speeches like that are what gets the girls to like him._

"Okay," Nick agreed, "but promise you won't make fun of me anymore."

"I promise," Kevin promised. Joe looked over, his eyes full of delight. "But I didn't. Nick and a girlie, sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-"

Kevin pushed him off the bed. Joe put his hands on the edge of the mattress and peeped over it, just the top of his head and eyes showing. "I think I'll probably just stay down here."

"That would be a good idea," Nick grimaced.

"So do you want a girlfriend? Anyone in mind?" Kevin asked Nick, his eyes serious.

"I just want girls to like me. They all like you and for some reason, Joe," Nick told him.

"That's because I got game and guns!" Joe's voice came from the floor.

"You liked the fans, right?" Kevin continued, ignoring Joe. Nick blushed. "Come on, Nick, all of us did. You don't have to be ashamed; you're going to grow up, get married, have kids! It's part of life!"

"But when I talk to them now, I freeze up and act like a complete _idiot_!" Nick retorted.

"Ok, I'll just help you handle them, ok? Now listen," Kevin looked like he was about to reveal a huge secret.

Nick leaned forward to hear. "Can you get on with it already?"

"Ok, so girls are really pretty, right?" Nick nodded. "They're all really talented and sometimes they want you to think-"

"Where are you going with this, Kevin?" Nick moaned.

"Ok, let me start over," Kevin composed himself again. "See, all girls are different, but somehow they're kind of similar too. They all pretend to be independent and strong, but most of them are just hopeless romantics who want a fairytale prince; does that make sense?"

"Yeah..."

"Ok, so you _have_ to make sure that you _protect_ them, but don't let them know that you're protecting them, only subtly, because if they think you're trying to get rid of their independence, they'll probably start yelling at you and slap you," Kevin's eyes lit up.

"I didn't get that..." Nick trailed off.

"Girls are really weird and confusing," Joe said from the floor. "They pretend to like you and then they don't. They have to be approached in a weird way."

Nick leaned over the side of the bed to see his second-oldest brother. "You explain then."

"See, with girls," Joe rolled over on his side to gaze straight up at Nick. "Eww, Nick, your hair is in my face," he said, removing some of Nick's curls.

Nick moved back, "Sorry."

"Anyways, with girls, you've got to be nice, but not _too_ nice or else they'll think you're a weird sap. You've got to be strong, but not to the extent where you're abusive. You've got to talk, but not so much that they can't talk at all. You've got to send them flowers, but not to the extent where you're obsessive. You've got to tell them you love them, but not too much or else they'll probably dump you. You've got to be good-looking, but never dress better than they do. You've got to be _fit_, but not to the extent where you make her look fat. You've got to have guns and a nice smile; I know because that's what makes them love _me_. You've got to be sweet, but not corny. You've got to be honest, but also reserved. You've got to be open, but _don't_ tell her anything. And you _can't_ move too fast," Joe finished his speech with a smile.

Nick winced. "Did you read this from a book?"

"No, I just learned from experience," Joe smirked.

"Oh," Nick paused.

Kevin grinned, "He's right you know. Girls are weird and confusing, but once you find one, pretty much never let her go. It's the most amazing feeling in the world."

"Oh, and if they want to complain about something, you _listen_ to it, even if it's the worst thing in the world. Because if you don't, they'll leave and you do _not_ want that, ok?" Joe chuckled.

"But what if I don't want to-?"

"Well then you'll become a bachelor," Kevin cut him off. "They're amazing things, girls. Really."

"But..." Nick stopped, "hey, how do you get them to notice you?"

"I'll let you in on a secret, Nick," Kevin told him. "It's in the eyes."

"What?" Nick asked.

"The _eyes_. Make them genuine, make them honest, make them show that you _care_. Be concerned. That makes girls pretty much worship you."

"Oh wow," Nick said. This all sounded so cheesy, but it seemed to make sense!

"And don't cheat on her; you'll get dumped in a heartbeat," Joe's voice came.

"It doesn't take a genius to figure that out," Nick said sarcastically.

"Well, you've got it then?" Kevin asked, not wanting Nick to kill Joe.

"Yeah. Eyes. Sweet. Loyal. Kind," Nick rattled off.

"Good. Now brush your teeth; we've got to wake up early tomorrow."

Nick turned and left the room; a little more _strut_ in his steps.

Joe jumped up on the bed. Kevin looked over at him with a knowing smirk, "He has _no_ idea what he's getting himself into."

**End.**

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Reviews are always appreciated.


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